Tuesday, April 1, 2008

The Jack Bauer Facts I



The time has come for me to post the first post about the Jack Bauer facts., the ones i like most that have a relation with the show itself. Here we go:

- Jack Bauer was recently named "most likely cause of injury" among C.T.U. security guards.
- Jack Bauer arrested RoboCop. Think about that.
- Only Jack Bauer can fly a plane from the luggage compartment.
- If Jack Bauer was president, he would protect the secret service.
- Most people would need months to recover from 20 months of Chinese interrogation. Jack Bauer needs a shower, a shave and a change of clothes.
- If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".
- There have been no terrorist attacks in United States since Jack Bauer has appeared on television.
- Jack doesn't believe in Murphy's Law, only Bauer's Law: "Whatever CAN go wrong, WILL be resolved in a period of 24 hours."
- Jack Bauer set an ordinary flash memory card to self-destruct. Don't ask how he did it, he's Jack Bauer.
- Tony was once shot in the neck, rushed to the hospital, underwent emergency surgery and was back on the job in just a few hours. Jack Bauer still can't believe he went to the hospital first.
- Don't ever ask Jack Bauer what is going on. He'll explain in the car.
- Chase Edmunds waited until he was sure Jack Bauer was dead before he dumped Kim.
- Jack Bauer literally died for his country, and lived to tell about it.
- Due to Jack Bauer, no one looks forward to the weekend anymore, they look forward to the weekend being over, and watching 24 on Monday.
- American Idol is only popular because it has a commercial for 24.
- 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
- The truth may hurt, but it doesn't hurt as much as Jack Bauer.
- Jack Bauer quit for just five minutes, and a nuclear bomb went off.
- Jack Bauer does not get taken prisoner. He puts himself in a disadvantageous position so as to make his next several killings more dramatic.
- Jack Bauer doesn't have a refresh button on his web browser. All events take place in real time.
- If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.
- If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Stalin and Hitler so they wouldn't have to bear witness to what he'd do to Nina.
- Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.

If any of these makes no sense, ask me, I will more than happy to clarify. Oh yes, this post will only be in english, sorry ^_^'.

5 comments:

Timothy Barton said...

I don't suppose you could tell us who Jack Bauer is (I hope this question doesn't sound dumb).

Synbios said...

Tim: Sure, no problem. There you go :D Who is Jack Bauer?. Or you can read my previous post about 24

NazguL2 said...

uuuh fuera !! plagio !! Los hechos de Chuck Norris son los originales :P

Synbios said...

nazgul2: tu t los has leido? Chuck Norris no podria haber hecho ninguno d esos xq son referentes a la serie! :P

NazguL2 said...

el hecho de q haya "hechos de" es el plagio, no el contenido en si :P